synesthete

#11ParanormalQuestions (non) VR to Amethyst Ascension

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Another quiz!  Cuz you know how much I like quizzes.  This one is from Amethyst Ascension on YouTube, who answered these questions herself in a live.

1. Do you believe in Aliens?

Yes.  Do I think they are humanoid?  Probably not.  I feel like statistically, there is no possible way there isn’t other life out there.  It may not be  sentient, or maybe it is.  It may not be humanoid, or maybe it is.  It may not be recognizable to US as “life”… but I absolutely do believe there is alien life out there in the universe.

2. Do you recall a past life?

I do not.  I have also never done a past life regression.

3. Do you believe in Mermaids?

I believe in the possibility of mermaids. More than eighty percent of our oceans are unmapped, unobserved, and unexplored.  I feel there is a huge possibility for a great many things lingering out there in the deep beyond our reach.

4. Do you believe in Bigfoot?

Like mermaids, I believe in the possibility of the existence of the Sasquatch. There’s still plenty of places on earth to hide, and for something the size of a man (or perhaps a bit larger?)  That’s a lot of room to roam without being observed.

5. Do you believe in Ghosts?

Absolutely.  I believe in reincarnation, and I believe that sometimes a soul lingers before it continues on into the next cycle.  I believe, also, that sometimes for whatever reason the soul can linger too long and end up stuck.

6. Do you believe in Vampires?

In the Bram Stoker / Anita Blake / Sookie Stackhouse sense?  Not really, no.   I am open to the possibility, though.  IF they exist, I would not be surprised to discover that they are some breed or another of the Fae.

7. Have you ever astral traveled that you remember?

Only in my room looking down upon myself.

8. Have you ever had sleep paralysis?

No.  Never.

9. Do you have any of the 8 psychic Clairs?

Yes, I have a touch of all eight.   I believe that everyone has a touch of all eight, it’s just that the volume is turned up for each of them to different levels in each individual.

For me, clairsentience is the strongest.  That said, I am also an auditory –> tactile/olfactory/gustatory synesthete.  This means that there are a lot of crossed wires in my brain where my hearing is concerned.  Sometimes the resulting experiences can be confused with some of the 8 psychic clairs.

10. Have you ever had a paranormal experience?

Define paranormal?  I’m really not sure how to answer this question, as I don’t really consider ghosts or the psychic clairs, or any of that to be “paranormal”.  Then again…

Comes back after looking up the definition of “Paranormal”, which is defined as… “denoting events or phenomena such as telekinesis or clairvoyance that are beyond the scope of normal scientific understanding”.

Under that definition?  Absolutely.  Many, many times.

11. Have you ever been abducted or contacted by aliens?

Not that I’m aware of.

I could have SWORN she’d also asked about Unicorns, although maybe that was only mentioned in the chat?  Anyway, I’ll answer that one too…

Bonus Question – Do you believe in Unicorns and the Fae?

The Fae…. 100% yes.  I do.  I do not believe that they are all pretty pixie-looking humanoids with gossamer butterfly wings, but I do absolutely believe in the Fae.  I can’t really say why or how I became so certain, but I have no doubt.

Unicorns…. I am of two minds on this one, although, I will say that the answer boils down to a yes either way.   In my opinion, the possibilities is split between 1) unicorns being a breed of the Fae and/or 2) the unicorns are an extinct species of animal.   I don’t really lean more one way or the other, I just logically speaking think it must be one of these.

 

 

Sensory Overload

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I think I’ve figured it out. Or at least perhaps a part of it.

Whenever I come here to visit my mother, I have a negative reaction to the time here. It’s not anything she says to me. After all, she has the same judgmental litany of complaints to share whether it’s in person or over the phone.

It’s not the memories of Dad, or the unpleasant memories of living in this house, either. Yes, they are all there, and yes, sometimes they affect me… but something in this house has in the last handful of years caused my visits here to turn even more negative than normal.

And… I think I figured it out.

It’s the noise.

It’s the constant incessant noise. The floors are wood, and since Dad died, Mother doesn’t require the removal of shoes in the house anymore. The living room has a high ceiling and a few years ago, she had all the carpet removed and wood flooring installed.

The TV is always on. Even when it’s not, every step, every movement, every voice, every SOUND is amplified and echoes. There’s no softness to absorb any of it, as much of the wall art and softer furnishings have been sold off or given away since Dad’s death.

It’s hollow and loud. Even when closed off in a different room, you can hear everything, just at a lower decibel.

It is a constant barrage on the senses… all of the senses, in my case. Or, well, four out of five at any rate.

It’s not just exhausting, or irritating, but feels like some insidious sort of violence, secret and subtle that works it’s way in and leaves you raw.

Gideon’s Challenge

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Resigned Irritation

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You see that fly up there?   The one buzzing around that young buck’s fuzzy horns?

That is my air conditioner.

At the beginning of the summer, the drone of this piece of machinery in my house is a subtle irritant.  It brushes, prickly and uncomfortable, over the backs of my upper arms and shoulders.  I fight to block it out, to ignore it’s touch upon my skin and go about my day.

As a child, I didn’t realize that not everyone could feel certain sounds.  Feel them like a physical touch on the flesh or a flavor on the tongue.   When I tried to express my discomfort or describe certain sounds, people looked at me like I’d lost my mind and my parents, concerned there was something wrong with me, took me to many doctors and I went through many tests.

I’m a synesthete, though.  And it simply means that the wires connected to certain senses are a bit “crossed”.   Sometimes, I wish that wasn’t the case.

Especially with the air conditioner.

Because by the end of the summer, the need for the air conditioner is still as strong as ever, but the sound of it has become more than just a subtle irritant pushed away to the back of my mind in an effort to ignore it.   It’s a roaring inferno of needle pricks along the backs of my shoulders and upper arms.  Painful and raw and constant.

My “slow crawl through hell” is almost over for the year, but I wish it was already gone.