self development through shadow work

📆 Transitioning from September to October

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Monthly Check-In Tarot Reading with Le Tarot de Marseille par Pole Ka

Here and Now I Exist – Who you are now, in your entirety.

Tres d’Épées – You are struggling with your mental health at this time. Let yourself acknowledge what is going on so that you can begin dealing with it.

The Slough – What is to be left in the past as you move forward.

Valet de Deniers – Income can’t come in any faster than you are able to produce it. Don’t get overconfident or you will end up making a fool of yourself.

What Lies Ahead – An ideal state or ideal self you are seeking at this time.

Cavalier de Bâton – You seek more enthusiasm and energy, but you may find that it will be too much for your own good if you manage to obtain it at this time.

Limitations – Negative influences, opposition, or ill will.

La Maison Dieu Rx – Over-catastrophizing the issues you are dealing with won’t do anything but exacerbate the problem.

The Boon – Positive influences, higher guidance, or divine intervention.

Quatre d’Épées – Rest and recovery still needs to remain your focus. Find healthy alternatives to stewing in stillness or picking up new projects and responsibilities when you are feeling restless.

The Wound – An unpleasant past experience or event that is ripe for some support and healing.

Dix d’Épées (tipped right) – Your fatalistic outlook is blocking your path forward to better things. It’s time to look at where the building blocks of that pessimism lay and begin exploring them.

Nostalgia – A positive past experience or event to acknowledge, reflect upon, and enjoy.

Valet de Coupe – Some origin story meandering down memory lane with Gideon could be good for you right now.

A Warning – Something coming that can be prevented or overcome.

Bonus Art Card – Don’t let your discomfort keep you from looking into the dark places where trouble congregates and tangles itself into knots. Pull out the issues and deal with them instead.

Empowerment – A future opportunity to work toward.

As de Bâton – Lean into enthusiastic curiosity and explore where it takes you.

Message from the Spirit World – Women trouble is fast approaching. Pay attention to the cues and clues, and be curious instead of put in the defensive. It won’t help anyone (not them or you) to get your back up, as you’ll just get more tangled in the chaos.

Message from the Mind’s World – Take things slow when you’re not feeling well, and don’t allow either yourself or others to push you with their expectations. Whether physical or mental, unwell is unwell. Treat yourself kindly instead of bending to pressure.

Message from the Physical World – There’s a painful lesson coming concerning not listening to your emotions. If you want to mitigate this lesson, you need to focus on approaching unpleasant surprises without letting your emotions take control… and not by burying them either.

Other elements included in this reading:
Staghorn Sumac for Connecting with Nature and the Wild Within
Dried Cedar Bundle for Protection from Negative Influences
Foraged Oak Branch with Moss and Lichen for Perseverance
Carnelian Agate Mushroom for Focusing On Aspirations
Selenite for Purification and drawing in Positive Energy

DECKS USED: LE TAROT DE MARSEILLE POLE KA

❤️ Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

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These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

Self Care Saturday Tarot Reading with the Seasons of the Witch Autumn Tarot and Autumn's Embrace Lenormand

Earth – Three of Autumn Swords – Learn from your hesitancy and recalcitrance. When you hesitate to act, disappointment is given roots, and you are left knowing its arrival is due to your own actions or lack there of. Don’t feel sorry for yourself. Instead, give yourself forgiveness and understanding while retaining the lesson learned so that you don’t have to repeat it. Strike while the iron is hot, or you’ll miss your chance.

Air – Seven of Autumn Swords – Take care with what you share openly with others this week. Make sure you are in a safe place before sharing potentially damning or divisive information. Just because you see omission as lying doesn’t mean you have to share every little thought and secret. Omission is sometimes the only prudent approach.

Water – Five of Autumn Pentacles – Where have you fallen into the mindset that feeling alone means that you are unwanted? You need to challenge your feelings of scarcity this week instead of falling into the trap of lies that can drag you deeper into the dark. Fight back against that cloying grip with a reality check.

Fire – The Autumn Hermit – Don’t use your moments of alone time to just wallow in solitude. Instead, use this time for self reflection and introspection. Look closer at the thoughts and feelings that drive you, and those that hold you back. A bit of introspection can help in not just organizing your thoughts, but also keep you more comfortable and surefooted in your journey on your life’s path.

Waning – Fish and Key – Don’t get so wrapped up in money matters that you forget it’s not the answer to everything.

Waxing – Lily and Garden – Do what you can to foster peace within yourself as you approach next weekend’s social obligations. Protect yourself from extra stress by using the tools you know work for you to help you keep your stress levels low.

Take Away – Take care when you communicate with others this week that you’re not sharing things that can be used against you either in the present or at a later date. This includes during your social obligations next weekend. Make sure you aren’t allowing your fears of scarcity to turn into a mindset, or it will cause an extra burden you don’t need as you move through this week. Instead, use your self care tools to keep yourself uplifted and take the time needed to know yourself better than anyone else before taking steps.

DECKS USED: SEASONS OF THE WITCH AUTUMN TAROT AND AUTUMN’S EMBRACE LENORMAND

❤️ Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

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These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

Self Care Saturday Tarot Reading with the Green Menagerie Tarot and Dawag Lenormand

Earth – The High Priestess – Follow your gut. If it doesn’t feel right, then don’t do it, no matter how tempting it may be. Not following your gut undermines your connection with your intuition, so listen and take to heart what it says instead of just hearing its message.

Air – Ace of Pentacles atop Six of Cups – If you want to attempt reconciliation, now’s the time. Buy some flowers and go for a visit. Communicate openly and make an effort. The channels of communication are open and receptive.

Water – Three of Wands – Reconciliation isn’t the only opportunity available to you this week if you’re willing to step up and take a plunge. It really depends on what you want out of the situations you find yourself in.

Fire – Queen of Pentacles – Make sure to focus upon the things that can offer growth, stability, and sustainability. There’s no point in jumping on an opportunity that will just weigh you down and take too much out of you to sustain and grow.

Waning – Bouquet and Coffin – Don’t allow people you don’t trust that you’ve cut out of your life to “butter you up” with gifts or ideas. There’s no boon there for you, no matter how pretty a ribbon they tie around it.

Waxing – Stork and Ring – This isn’t to say there isn’t good stuff poised to land on your doorstep, just be careful who you trust to keep their promises.

Take Away – Lots of opportunities coming your way this week from potential reconciliation to opportunities to seize upon wants and desires. Keep in mind when making decisions that sustainability is going to be a key factor, and that even above that is your gut’s reaction. If you gut says no… the answer is no. Even if you can’t reason out why.

DECKS USED: THE GREEN MENAGERIE TAROT AND DAWAG LENORMAND

❤️ Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

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These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

Self Care Saturday Tarot Reading with The Banquet of Skeletal Strawberry Tarot and Folk Art Lenormand

Earth – The Devil – Take care to keep a close eye on your temptations and addictions this week. They will be abundant and have a high risk of influencing your finances in negative ways if you let them. Loosen the reigns at your own peril.

Air – The High Priestess – Prioritize intuition over logic in the week ahead. Don’t allow your reasoning to usurp intuition’s judgement. The first call is the right one.

Water – Two of Pentacles – Do what is needed to keep a good balance on your emotions this week. That means not just making sure that you’re taking your medication when you need to, but talking to Gideon as things arise, doing your meditation, and otherwise treating yourself kindly… just not so kindly that everything else falls out of place.

Fire – The Sun – Continue working towards that “fun in the sun” attitude while you still have the opportunity to do so. Enjoy your time outside and take advantage of good weather when the opportunity presents itself.

Waning – Mice and Fish – Make sure you are identifying bullshit as the bullshit it is instead of trying to put a positive spin on it. Sometimes it’s important to see things for the bald faced corrosive mess that they really are so that they can be dealt with instead of pandered to.

Waxing – Snake and Ship – The trip you have coming up next month is going to come with a viper in your midst. Don’t ignore the possibility that this could turn ugly if you aren’t on your toes through the preparation process. This doesn’t mean cancel the trip, but it does mean to make sure that you are aware of the possibilities and prepared for what might come.

Take Away – The struggle is real this week between you and your addictive tendencies. That dopamine fix is calling your name. Make sure you are paying attention to where it hits and doing what you need to do to keep yourself uplifted so that you can better resist its call.
Also make sure that as preparations are put in place for next month’s trip that you are getting what -you- want out of the experience. Don’t let them de-prioritize what you deem important just because they don’t see any value in it.

DECKS USED: THE BANQUET OF SKELETAL STRAWBERRY TAROT AND FOLK ART LENORMAND

❤️ Self Care Saturday (On a Sunday)

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These Saturday readings are (not usually) bearing in on any one thing or event in my life, as the question used is asking for a more general outlook. This is a self care exercise, and is not meant as a predictive reading… although that, too, happens on occasion.

The question is… What do I need to focus for self-care through the week ahead?

Self Care Saturday Tarot Reading with the Green Witchery Tarot and Dramatic Lenormand

Earth – Five of Crystals – You may feel like things aren’t coming together how you’d planned and worked for this week. Do your best to stay positive and look on the bright side, even when you’re feeling cut off at the knees.

Air – The Empress – Kind and nurturing self talk is needed this week. Don’t let misunderstandings turn the innocuous into an opportunity for self-abuse.

Water – Page of Goblets – Cut yourself a break and offer yourself some kindness instead of the harsher treatment that is you habit. Make a mess, and feel pride over it instead of guilt.

Fire – Four of Goblets – Time alone isn’t for brooding, it’s for refilling your cups. Use this time to provide yourself with much needed self-care and recovery, instead of rehashing what didn’t go right and how that’s somehow on you.

Waning – Snake and Clouds – Turn away from venomous reactions during times of emotional upheaval. Just because things feel dark and uncertain doesn’t mean they actually are. Consider that your perception is just that… perception. An illusion brought about by emotional response.

Waxing – Key and Book – Don’t sit in misery feeling helpless this week. Research solutions instead. By seeking extra knowledge on the problem at hand you empower yourself to strive and thrive instead of surrender.

Take Away – It looks like it’s going to be a rough week emotionally.  Make sure you are keeping up on the tools that help you in balancing out your negative and pessimistic tendencies.  When things go awry, don’t stew in bad energy but instead use these moments as motivation to research and dig for answers and activities you can do to help make things better.  This week will be a test upon your efforts toward positivity and optimism.  Take a breath when tensions rise and give yourself some grace and understanding.

DECKS USED: THE GREEN WITCHERY TAROT AND DRAMATIC LENORMAND

📆 Transitioning from August to September

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Monthly Check-In Oracle Reading with the Spirits of the Hedgerow and Shadows of the Hedgerow

Here and Now I Exist – Who you are now, in your entirety.

Deaths Cap – It’s okay to not be okay. You are masking heavily right now instead of being honest about how you’re feeling, and beating yourself up for your mistakes using the excuse that the punishment will “make the lessons stick”, when in actuality it’s just self-abuse. Hold on tight to the temporary nature of moods, emotions, and the stages of mental health struggles.

The Slough – What is to be left in the past as you move forward.

Hemlock – Weed out those in your life that are only there to use you. Their roots need to be thoroughly excavated, and a watchful eye trained on making sure once removed they don’t try to resurface and settle back in.

What Lies Ahead – An ideal state or ideal self you are seeking at this time.

Rosehip – It’s time to pay particularly close attention to your health. Make sure you are eating right, taking your meds as directed, and moving your body. Do what’s needed to keep yourself healthy and hale.

Limitations – Negative influences, opposition, or ill will.

Lords and Ladies – Perfectionism is not your friend. Holding yourself to unreasonable expectations doesn’t motivate for a good result, it just gives your inner narrative something to kick at while simultaneously setting yourself up to fail. Let go of impossible standards and unreasonable expectations. They are hurting your progress.

The Boon – Positive influences, higher guidance, or divine intervention.

Hensbane – Your pain is valid, whether that pain is physical or emotional. Seek out those that are empathetic to you and your needs, open to you expressing them as best you can, and supportive even in those times they might not fully understand your suffering.

The Wound – An unpleasant past experience or event that is ripe for some support and healing.

Cyclamen – Take time to reflect on the obstacles that you have overcome in the past and work on letting go of the ones that you failed to overcome. They also hold value, but only if you dig for the benefits they have to offer you. If you don’t, these wounds never fully heal.

Nostalgia – A positive past experience or event to acknowledge, reflect upon, and enjoy.

Daisy – Look at the positive benefits you’ve experienced from adding a positivity practice into your daily routine. It’s time to re-familiarize yourself with what this practice and other wellness practices offer you, instead of looking at them as just another chore or otherwise taking them for granted.

A Warning – Something coming that can be prevented or overcome.

Imbolc – You are running the risk of falling into darkness (depression). Make sure you are focusing on the light with your attention trained on positivity and optimism, rather than on the familiar pull that feels seductively comfortable but is anything but.

Empowerment – A future opportunity to work toward.

Blackthorn – Check in with yourself and what really matters. Let the minor inconveniences go instead of allowing them to pile up into a potential explosion.

Message from the Spirit World – Take care not to use positivity to cover up the pain. That makes the positivity toxic. Instead, use it as a tool for checking in with yourself when you’re blowing things out of proportion and catastrophizing.

Message from the Mind’s World – Use those times when you’re not okay as a tool to suss out those that don’t have your best interests at heart. Their true colors will show in their apathy toward your struggles and well-being.

Message from the Physical World – Your perfectionist tendencies makes it hard to take joy in the activities you don’t complete perfectly. It’s time to let go of that mindset and instead celebrate even your small accomplishments. Ex: You may not have completed the trail you chose to hike, but you still got yourself out in nature and you made it to the half way mark before turning back.

Other elements included in this reading:
Pressed Pansy Flower for Hearing the Heart More Clearly
Dried Red Maple Leaf for Adaptability and Connection
Foraged Oak Branch with Moss and Lichen for Perseverance
Gray Agate for Instilling Gentleness, Calm, and Stability
Moss Agate Tree for Attracting Opportunities for Growth
Selenite for Purification and drawing in Positive Energy

DECKS USED: SPIRITS OF THE HEDGEROW ORACLE AND SHADOWS OF THE HEDGEROW ORACLE