Finding the Fire Within – Part III

Stretch Lenormand - Finding the Fire Within Reading

How can I incorporate self-discipline to stay true to myself moving forward?

Dog and Birds – Be kind and loyal to yourself. Don’t allow your inner narrative to turn ugly and hurtful, but instead use your self discipline to bolster yourself with positive feedback and kindness.

What should I avoid?

Scythe and Ship – Being cruel to yourself isn’t going to get you anywhere. Self- flagellation only holds you back.

What lessons have I learned from this process?

House and Child – To see my personal “sphere” in a different light that is more open and positive than before.  Opening my eyes required re-framing how I see things, and these readings have assisted me in that, allowing me to take a fresh look at what I’ve built in my life and the shelter it provides.

What inspires me to be true to myself?

Broom and Mountain – This answer might seem a bit odd, but it’s the things that I have struggled to overcome that give me the strength and inspiration to be my  true self.  Some organisms grow best in ash instead of soil.

How does my authentic self align with my purpose?

Letter and Fish – By chronicling your journey as you work to learn to better go with the flow of life’s currents, you don’t just allow yourself to reflect back on your personal journey, but allow others to be inspired in the sharing of it.

A card for self-care.

Cross and Stork – Don’t forget that you require a certain amount of recovery and recuperation after shifts of fate and unexpected changes.  It’s okay to give yourself that time, to allow yourself to sink into it instead of pushing forward.

DECK USED:  STRETCH LENORMAND

Finding the Fire Within Part II

Finding the Fame Within Part 2 - Lenormand Reflet di Lune

How can I release my fears and insecurities?

Anchor and Crossroads – Make sure that you are grounding yourself, so that when difficult choices arise you’ll be on solid footing. It’s always more difficult to make good decisions when your life feels chaotic and your energy is out of balance.  This process becomes even more difficult when that imbalance allows fears and insecurities to slip in and pollute the decision making process.  By having a steadily grounded foundation under your feet during these times, there’s less chance of those emotions screwing with your decisions.

What steps can I take to more deeply embrace my true self?

Lady, Moon, Cross – You need to return to doing regular lunar rituals with L. Not only do they provide a deeper connection with your path, your spirituality, and the energies surrounding you, but they connect you more deeply with L as well. As your other half, she is a part of you and you a part of her.

How can I protect myself from external factors?

Ship and Lily – Visit your mother.  You may not entirely understand how this can protect you from external factors, but the cards here indicate that visiting your mother will do so.  Perhaps it will douse the fire of her outrage and future machinations or something.

How can I boost my confidence to express myself?

Book and Key – Knowledge is power. Do your research so that whatever you are expressing yourself about can be resourced if needed. Having a strong foundation of sources to back up your knowledge will provide you with more confidence in what you are saying. Consider, on certain topics, noting down a list of resources for future reference.

What guidance do I need through this process?

House and Mountain – Retreat to the comfort of home when things feel insurmountable. Allow that comfort that both your physical home, as well as Gid and L, can provide to soothe you and shore up your strength to try again.

Self CareFish – For now? Just go with the flow. You can worry about the more challenging stuff later on.

DECK USED: LENORMAND REFLET DE LUNE

Finding the Fire Within – Part 1

Sofia Rito Lenormand

How can I discover my true self?

Rider and Stork – Trust yourself and your ability to weather change like a champ. More often than not,  you’re capable of seeing change coming long before it arrives. You already know yourself well enough to adapt without losing yourself in the shuffle, but by not ignoring what you see coming you can give yourself a bit of extra time to not get flustered and stay true to the path you want to be on and person you want to be.

What fears are holding me back from growth?

Letter and Lady – Ugh.  Seriously?  Okay so… yes.  I have mommy issues.  I fear the loss of my mother’s love and care, regardless of the fact that I’ve never really had all that much of it in the first place. I fear the painful and even cruel things she might say, and how much they would hurt to hear them from her.

I am not in any way, shape, or form, dishonest with her about who I am or what I do… but, there is a fear in me of losing what little… love there is from that corner somehow and I avoid her for this reason.  This avoidance and the fear that it’s rooted in hold me back in my personal growth and are a theme of shadow work that I need to look at exploring in the future.

What external factors are holding me back?

Tower and Key – Yes… I also have authority issues.  Although I am able to function around those issues for the most part, there are times when I struggle. Customs and border patrol agents, police officers, etc… these authority figures trigger my issues, especially if they are playing the “authoritarian” card in their interactions with me.  It does hold me back, too, because once I’ve been triggered and my back is up, it becomes far less likely I’ll be able to deal with them in my normally unflappable-seeming manner… causing hold ups and delays that otherwise wouldn’t happen.

How have these internal and external factors hindered my growth?

Crossroads and Book – They can cause you to be shortsighted, and not be as observant on gathering as much information as is needed to develop past these issues.

What would it be like to release those fears?

Scythe and Garden – Less cutting inner narrative. Less fear of external cutting narratives. This would result in more confidence because these things would no longer be a deciding factor and would carry far less weight than they do now.

I forgot to do the self care card at the bottom.  But, I did do a self care reading on Saturday.

DECK USED:  SOFIA RITO LENORMAND

Morning Bonus Read – Monthly Key Spread

Monthly Key Spread - Tempus Fugit Lenormand

Key to Your Heart: What will Guide you to make decisions that are aligned with your heart and your truths this month?

The Whip and The Book – Make sure you are focusing on getting things in order and not screwing off or fucking around this month.  Although the work side of things is not yet upon you, it’s time to start getting your ducks in a row when it comes to making a plan, detailing out what needs to be done, and gearing up for the mindset needed to dive into holiday prep.

[Side Note: Whenever I see the whip and the book together, it makes me think of those teacher nuns with the rulers and the knuckle slaps? No, this is not something I’ve personally experienced, but it very much is what comes to mind when these two cards come together.|

Anchor: What will ground you in the face of anxiety, stress, overwhelm, and existential dread in general?

Feminine Energy – Look to the women in your life for support when you are feeling overwhelmed or stressed. L is still around and willing to help in any way she can, but you have to actually be willing to reach out and ask for that help.

Star Wand: What accelerates your magic, creativity, and manifestation powers?

The Letter – You need to make that list that you wrote about the other day. Fill it with your accomplishments, with what you’ve done to improve yourself and your life this year, what you’ve overcome, and the good decisions you have made.

Blessings from the Stars: The Universe has got your back – how will you be supported this month?

The Clover – Luck is on your side.  It might come as a “flash in the pan”, but good fortune will be there for you when you need it most.

One Trick Up Your Sleeve: A life saving idea or inspiration for any unexpected challenge or difficult moments?

The Fox – You were blessed with a quick and clever mind.  Use it. Pay attention to what’s going on around you, keep in mind the motives of others, and use your cunning mind to stay engaged… and you’ll be fine.

Emergence Pt 1: What is emerging within you / within your reality right now?

The Ring – Commitments and responsibilities are starting to rise up. Make sure you’re not taking on more than you can handle or end up painting yourself into a corner.

Emergence Pt 2: What are you expanding towards?

The Dog – A blast from the past is coming.  This isn’t someone with negative motives or motivations, but rather someone you knew and was a friend returning…. or rather, you are returning to their lives rather than the other way around (although it might feel as if they are coming into your life).

DECK USED:  TEMPUS FUGIT LENORMAND

Morning Bonus Read – Anxious Days

St Croix Lenormand

What can I control?

Book – Knowledge is power and you have the opportunity to seize a great deal of power if you keep your eyes and mind open, and actually delve into unearthing the knowledge needed to succeed. You have the ability to grasp the abstract and those things hidden between the lines, understand complicated and convoluted concepts, and stretch your potential through exploration of such things.

What can’t I control?

Snake – Oh geez.  Okay so this is the PayPal thing again. YES.  I know.  I need to be adaptive and move forward instead of lingering in what I can’t control or do anything about.  The feelings of betrayal are painful, but I am definitely ready to set them aside.  I understand that I may not quite have fully let go of the emotional upheaval that it caused, but I truly do understand that it’s out of my control and something I need to move on from.

How can I work with what I can control?

Woman – Keep in mind that just because Z has gone home doesn’t mean she is not still in easy reach. The valuable advice and guidance she has offered you throughout your life was closer than ever over the past year and a half, but it isn’t gone now that she’s back home.  Reach out to discuss new ideas and discoveries with you, for her input will be as valuable as always.

How can I release what I can’t control?

Mountain – You’re not going to get any answers about why this happened. There is no resolution in sight and you need to just let it go rather than brooding on it or squirming under the feeling of betrayal and injustice that the experience stirred up for you.

Take Away – Dive into searching out different alternative payment methods and ways of doing things that don’t involve PayPal and let go of the feelings that were stirred up by the experience.  Enlist Z’s help in finding new options and looking into their merit.

DECK USED:  ST CROIX LENORMAND

Morning Bonus Read – Self Love

Hilda Lenormand - Self Love Reading

Something to love about myself.
The Bear and The Tree

Regardless of the chronic pain I experience on the daily, I am always able to move forward into the activities I enjoy and dive into them again and again. This allows me to go out into nature and hike without worrying about if I’ll be able to handle the trails laid out before me, or passing up on some of those that will spiritually benefit me the most due to my body’s inability to handle the climb.

Where can I be more patient with myself?
The Broom and The Clouds

It’s important to remember that the pleasure seeking I do and the addictive tendencies I have are rooted in something that needs healed. They are a self-medicating behavior.  Don’t just berate myself when these behaviors get out of control, but be patient and look at what has triggered things to advance into unhealthy territory.

Where can I be kinder to myself?
The Clover and The Bouquet

Allow yourself to enjoy times when things are good and pleasure can be had.  It’s okay to sink into the enjoyment and pleasure, and wallow in a bit of happiness now and then.  There’s nothing wrong with that and it is a gift to yourself that can help you in restoring yourself and your view of the world around you.

Energies and strategies to draw on.
The Garden and The Tower

Lean into others to help you in moving forward and making sure you see what’s coming and can deal with it in a capable way.  You aren’t alone and you have others to support you, don’t forget about them when you need them.

DECK USED:  HILDA LENORMAND