Gratitude Is An Offering

Today’s meditation was fifteen minutes long and attached to the end of my extended yoga / physio practice that I did this morning.  It was a good idea to give it a day between sessions of the new routine in order to let my muscles ease a bit.  I’ll continue the on-again off-again schedule for the next few weeks.   I don’t plan on making the added routine permanent, but I think that until I can get back to the chiropractor on a regular schedule it’d be a good idea to continue on with it.

Herbcrafter's TarotToday’s draw is the Madre of Earth (Queen of Pentacles) which is traditionally a representation of a receptive alpha energy, personality, or person in the area of one’s finances, resources, health, manifestations, and the physical world. This often translates into a theme of nurturing energy that is both strong and supportive.

I know that in the guidebook for this deck, it says that the hands holding the bowl are making an offering to deity, but when I look at the imagery on this card today, I do not see an offering…. I see an expression of gratitude as those hands accept a gift from nature.

Larrea tridentata (Creosote bush) is definitely one of those things to be grateful for in nature.  It is an extremely useful plant that survives in places and climates that most plants can’t.  It is antimicrobial, fever reducing, and useful in treating a vast array of different physical ills from diarrhea and sinusitis, to general pain complaints and arthritis, anemia, and even stomach cramps.

The message in today’s card is about gratitude and respect.  You don’t take what is not sustainable, and you always show gratitude for what is given and used. This form of respect is something that seems to be lost by so many these days, and forgotten by society at large.  The message here today is to not allow yourself to be one of those that forget. Practice gratitude, be mindful of what you take and what you use, and always show respect for what has been given and where it comes from.


#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
I’m struggling to maintain motivation.
:  How can I accept that willpower is a limited resource?

Dixit Cards v4 Origins Expansion Pack

Reading Summary: Remember all the times that you have intrepidly move yourself forward (Left Card) even when you were out of your comfort zone (Center Card), and how it is so anxiety ridden to be there (Big Eye… Worried Fish). And how refreshed you feel after taking a rest and some time in Gideon’s care (Right Card).

Take Away:  This is about knowing when to yield.  You can push on and push and push and push yourself until you’re a mess of anxiety and tied up in knots, but sooner or later you -have to- let go.  That makes willpower not a personality trait, but a skill or ability.  And like all skills and abilities?  They require times of rest and recharging.


#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Write something free form inspired by the cards.

Tarot MaddonniThere was once a young king named Keern, who ran his kingdom with great love (King of Cups). Sometimes he felt overburdened (Ten of Wands), but he chose to push through these feelings and direct them into providing strength (La Force) to his kingdom by protecting all within his realm (Nine of Wands).

And yet even then, he felt disenchanted (Four of Cups) and alone (Nine of Coins)

Although he was a very picky man (Judgement), he decided it was time to take a wife. And so King Keern began to seek out someone with similar ideals to his own they could help him foster and nurture his people (The Empress).

He met with many women, and there were so many more to choose from! There were so many, in fact, that his search became a burden in and of itself (Seven of Cups).

Then one day on his search, Keern met a poor man down on his luck (Five of Coins) named Heste, who encouraged him to sit down and discuss his problems. The king had love in his heart for all his subjects, and did so.  At the end of the discussion this man helped him to see that he was going after what was expected of him rather than what he really wanted (The Pope).

This conversation helped the king to realize that the heart wants what the heart wants… no matter what others think. Seeing things from this new perspective, Keern then changed his tactics and purpose (Hanged Man).   He opened himself up to more options, and in the end he found his true love among not the women of his kingdom at all.   Instead, it was the wise peasant with whom he’d spoken to that day he found his mind and heart drawn to, and so Keern brought Heste home to the castle to take on their future… together (The Lovers).


#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
dream // plan // manifest

Women of Science Tarot

DreamTen of Nano – Emotional fulfillment is something that I can’t even imagine, but I do hope for.  I think that perhaps once I have gotten to a point where I’m more comfortable with my emotions that this dream will be more easily realized… rather than a concept that “sounds good”.

PlanKnight of Nano – Moving forward emotionally is often just like moving forward in any capacity.  Sometimes?  You have to factor in a bit of planning.  I’m in the process of finding “comfortable” with the new emotional levels I’ve grown into over the past few months.  Having a plan in place to allow that growth to settle in might be a good idea to consider.

ManifestTwo of Macro and Eight of Astro – Allow yourself to see the blockages that are self created and standing in the way to getting your new balance of responsibilities set into place.  If you want to make this new balance a reality, you need to be open to those self restricting beliefs and behaviors that are still holding you back.


#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question:  How will I know if I have achieved my creative calling?

Psychopomp Tarot

Reading Summary: Elements that will be present include inspiration to move forward (Two of Wands), a sense of connectivity with myself and the universe (The Star) and  And a feeling of balance and rightness in my direction (Justice).

Take Away:  When it all comes together and feels right?  That’s when you’re in your element and have hit that mark.  This is about how it feels in the moment and like the two hands that paint each other in the Two of Wands card, this calling is not stagnant or permanent, but ever changing and cyclical. What is my creative calling ten years ago may not be my creative calling ten years from now… and that’s okay.  As long as it feels right.


The Dip in the Cycle

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long and was one of the harp strings meditations with interval timers.  I was right yesterday, when I said that I would be more sore today than usual after I upped my yoga/physio practice and extra stretching.  I think it was a good choice, though.  My body had become used to the normal routine, so it’s good to mix it up just a bit.

Herbcrafter's TarotToday’s draw is The Fool card, which is traditionally interpreted as a representation of innocence and carefree enthusiasm.

The Fool is all about new beginnings, and what better symbol to use for The Fool that the Dandelion.  This is an herb that crops up seemingly on its own, and crops up… and crops up… and crops up.  It multiplies like crazy, flourishes again and again and has a life cycle that returns to be renewed over and over.

Metaphysically, the dandelion is about surviving through challenges and difficulties by rising above through the power of warmth, positivity and hope.

The message in today’s card is to reach for that positivity… reach for the optimism and the hope.  Remember that the subdrop, like all unpleasant moments of emotional upheaval, is just a phase in a cycle that is mostly good.  Almost all good.  But every cycle has to have a dip somewhere along the path.  It’s temporary, and you’ll be rolling back around to somewhere more positive soon enough.


#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
Take For Myself / Give To Others

Aquarian TarotTake For MyselfNine of Pentacles – You need alone time in which to enjoy the fruits of your labors without others around to distract or otherwise detract from the experience. There’s nothing wrong with this, so take that time when you need it.

Give to OthersThree of Cups Rx –  This fits in with the “take for myself” part of the reading, as it speaks of allowing others to go have their fun without me. You don’t need to be there for everything and you don’t really want to be even if you could.   So let go of the feeling of “slacking off” or “neglect” that comes up whenever you leave everyone to their own devices and go off on your own.


#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
  practice // practice // practice

Minchiate Etruria Anima Antiqua

Aquarius and Three of Cups RxPractice at optimism. In the Minchiate Etruria, the Three of Cups is about a favorable turn of events, or an unusual and unexpected circumstance. The Aquarius is about having an open mind and open heart. Together, these two cards are an encouragement towards optimism, and making sure that you look for the positive opportunities presented through unexpected events.

Four of Staves Practice at attuning to the “harmonious” coming together of different energies and forces.  Sometimes when things come together, they do so like pieces of a puzzle falling into place. Don’t take these moments for granted or let them to pass you by. Instead, pay attention and learn how to better identify when opportunities are presented through this union of harmonious energies.

House of the Devil (The Tower)Practice trusting in things to balance themselves out when in the middle of chaos.  Sometimes it’s easy to get caught up in the moment and all the cacophony of sudden change.  It’s important during these times to remember that this shit is temporary.  It’s a shift.  Like an earthquake shifts the earth, and then the earth settles into a new configuration afterward.  So too does the calamity and chaos of change settle into a new configuration of reality.


#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
Question:  When am I most creatively confident?

Student Tarot v4 Godard's Birds

Reading Summary:  When I actually make the choice (Two of Swords) to make the time for creative writing (imagery in the Six of Cups) with Gideon (The Lovers and The Empress).

Take Away: Gideon is expressed here by both the Lovers and the Empress, because he represents both of these themes to me at once.  He is my love, my choice, and my committment.  He is also my comfort and my encouragement.  He provide me these things along with his love and his support, while still fostering my own strength at the same time.

It makes sense, then, that when I am creating with him, it would be one of the times when I am at my most creative.  We create worlds together, lives together, stories together. We bounce ideas off of each other, and weave those ideas and our mutual creativity together into wondrous expressions of our emotions, our dedication, our passions, our desires, and our love for each other again and again.


Looking Out the Windows

Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long, and was another of the harps strings meditations with interval timer of chimes to help me through the stretching part of the process. It was very relaxing, and as often seems to happen these days when I meditate, I ended up in a bit of a nap afterward. Just saying? But having fruit in the house was a real motivator to get me going as well surprisingly. I was very eager to make myself my berry smoothie, so when I woke up there was no dawdling at all.

Herbcrafter's TarotToday’s draw is the Four of Earth (Four of Pentacles) which is traditionally a representation of stability in hearth and home, finances and resources, as well as one’s health and manifestation goals.  This can also easily turn into a negative card if one takes that stability too far and becomes miserly or overly focused.

Although basket weaving is in the forefront and represents home and hearth to me as well as taking care of those you love, what really stood out to me today is the willow in the background. Medically speaking, its properties include use as an astringent and fever reducer, and the salicin in its bark is the active ingredient in aspirin.   Metaphysically, this tree is considered a sheltering protector and is associated with immortality through it’s reproductive abilities.

What I see as the message in today’s card is a combination of what sits in the foreground, and the willow that drew my eye to the background.  The willow is a protective tree.  It shelters many secrets within its shady embrace and protects them from discovery and harm.  So too does the Four of Earth offer protection through the sheltering protection of stability.

Just don’t get so focused upon that shelter that you forget to look beyond it.


#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
  I’m so burnt out all the time.
What can I do to remind myself that rest is important before I’m in desperate need of it?

Star Seeker Tarot

Reading Summary: Learn to recognize the signs (Page of Swords), and then seize steady and rooted control (King of Pentacles) to keep things balanced by using the tools at your disposal (The Magician).

Take Away: To make sure that I’m staying on top of when I need rest and when it is most important to my health and well being, I need to pay attention to the signs and not ignore them as I usually do.  Instead, I need to take them seriously and use them as a trigger to bring my responsible self forward and do what needs done to solve the problem before it becomes detrimental to me.


#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
  Do Spread #2
How can I make sure that I don’t backslide in my emotional growth from this year?

Dixit Cards v4 Origins Expansion PackReading Summary: The combination of colors that coincide with each other in the second and third cards, connect these cards together, whereas the complete difference in colors and shapes through the first card in relation to the other two mark it as an outlier.

In the first two cards we have a crazily swirling sea with lots of unknown monsters in the dark, and yet the child sleeps and the sailor continues to row his boat.  This indicates a need to accept that uncertainty happens.  The world within the spin of a roulette like wheel then continues that theme, saying that that the presence of uncertainty in life is a part how the world works.

The outlier card, stands alone, separate from the other two by form and shape, subject matter and colors. The figures are packed and moving on…. and this indicates that the uncertainty indicated in the other two cards does not mean that you can just pack up and walk away.

Take Away: The cards here indicate that my biggest hurdle to trigger backsliding is emotional turbulence and uncertainty.  My natural response to these things is to close up and turn inward, retreating from others and the world in order to pull up my “walls” and hide behind them.   In order to keep from backsliding in my emotional growth, I need to accept that uncertainty is a part of life and that retreating from it solves nothing.  Don’t run away, stay and see things through instead.


#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
what you project // what you take in // what lies deep within

Animism Tarot

What I ProjectThe High Priestess – Mystery in the knowledge of secrets. I found this card to be an interesting response to this question, but at the same time, it also makes sense considering my background and knowledge garnered from being a life-long pagan, fortune teller, and witch.  I think it’s more the “secret” part of the answer that gave me pause, as I’m always so willing to be open about my history and my knowledge, should anyone want to ask.

What I Take InNine of Wands – Energy.  I take in the energy of others, which is often defensive.  I didn’t realize this until recently when Kev did my Human Design System reading. A good deal of the reading rang true, and that included the part about my struggle to connect with others. When I rub people the wrong way, I feel that deeply as it is reflected back to me.  I’ve considered restructuring my shielding to deflect this, but I find the input helpful.

What Lies Deep WithinFive of Pentacles – Depression and pessimism.  As I mentioned in yesterday’s reading, I’m upfront about the fact that I deal with depression and have done so throughout my life… and yet when a depressive episode comes upon me, I work to hide it both from others as well as myself.  My pessimism is something I also try to hide, although it more often becomes apparent during times when I’m feeling especially grouchy.  These things live deep within me, and although I struggle with them and try to fight against them when they rise up?  I don’t think they can really be abolished so much as… managed.


Struggling With Disappointment

Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and one of the harp strings meditations with the interval chimes to walk me through my piriformis stretching.  I had a little bit of difficulty focusing today during the meditation, probably because today was one of my “long ass drive” days and I was really far more interested in getting my ass on the road than taking the time to meditate.  I did do it, though, no matter how much I felt the need to squirm my way through it.

Herbcrafter's TarotToday’s draw is the Five of Water (Five of Cups) which is traditionally interpreted as an indication of pessimism or apathy. It is, essentially, the “glass half empty” card and can often be interpreted not just as pessimism or disappointment, but also themes to do with one’s attitudes around failure.

I’m  not going to go into goldenseal today, as what is really important about this card today, and the message that lies within it, is twofold and already very evident to me.  The first message being that when you have that “meh” feeling, it’s important to pay attention to it instead of just following where it leads. What is it really about? Why has it surfaced? Why are you following it so blindly instead of examining it closely? Don’t just accept it at face value.

The second message in the appearance of this card today has to do with the incident with my mother.  I feel like an idiot for being excited when I opened a surprise package from my mother and found her Hoi Polloi inside.   I should have known better than to think it was just a kindness because she knows it was something I want.  I should have known that it would be an effort to manipulate me in some way.

I was stupid not to realize it, or at least suspect.  I didn’t, and the feeling of disappointment and pessimistic unpleasantness that came when she displayed her true colors yet again and showed me that the ‘gift’ was really a manipulation tactic… was crushing.   Again.  And thus comes in the Five of Cups.

I need to turn remember what I have that is good instead of focusing on the shit.  I guess I’m just… taking a moment to throw my own pity party first.  I won’t let it last, though, I promise.


#TarotForGrowthJuly Challenge Prompt
  I’m so burnt out all the time.
  What causes me to be resistant toward rest?

Hanson Roberts Tarot

Reading Summary: The fear that if I don’t keep going and juggling everything (Two of Pentacles) that shit will fall apart (The Tower)… It also allows me to avoid owning my own emotions (King of Cups Rx).

Take Away:  If I’m too busy to rest, then I’m too busy to deal with my emotions, and thus I have an excuse to bury them instead of dealing with them.  This, combined with my constant fear of “dropping the ball” and everything crashing down around me as a result are the things that most significantly influence why I’m resistant toward rest.


#DiscordTarotholicsJul2020 Challenge Prompt
What in my life could benefit from more honesty?

Evolution TarotReading Summary:  You can have all the tools in the world (The Magician) and all the resources you need at your disposal (King of Coins), but any addiction allowed to flourish out of control will knock you on your ass if given the opportunity to do so (The Devil).

Take Away:  This is why even though moderation is not at all my favorite thing, it is so very important.  I’ve admitted this before that I was a bit fast and loose with my money over late-spring and early-summer.  That sort of thing is nice now and then, but it’s not sustainable for long.

What needs could benefit from more honesty in my life is that I need to look close at my spending and do the work to get things back on the moderate side of self-control again.


#OwlandBonesJuly Challenge by Owl and Bones Tarot
share // save

Women of Science TarotShareTen of Nano (Water) – Share the love.  This isn’t about money or resources, it’s about support and emotion.  It’s about love, and sharing that love with those that are important to you and closest to you.   With what happened with mom today, my first instinct was to close up and curl in on myself.  A better route is to stay open and share my feelings with others that love and understand me.

SaveSeven of Macro (Earth) – Slow growth takes time, preservation, and conservation.  It isn’t something immediate, but gradual.  This takes patience.  It’s important to make sure you don’t throw patience out the window when you feel frustrated.  Instead, take a deep breath and persevere.