growing up witch

#31DaysofWitchcraft Prompt 28 (non)VR to Heather Carter

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Heather Carter on YouTube put together a series of prompts titled #31DaysofWitchcraft that she’s been working her way through since the beginning of May. I really like this idea, but I can’t handle the responsibility of any more daily posts, so I thought that for the next few weeks, I would do one (or a few at a time) for the end of week “My Pagan Perspective” posts and work through them a bit at a time.

acorn

Today’s prompt is #28, and is about how I was raised and the path that it lead me to be on now.  This is a topic I’ve probably posted on before and definitely one that I’ve discussed with you… but I didn’t want to leave it out.

28. What belief system, if any, were you raised with? How has that impacted your personal practice?

I was raised in a Wiccan/Buddhist household.  My mother is Wiccan and was pretty much almost solely responsible for the spiritual upbringing of my sister and I.  We were raised to follow the wheel of the year and worship the god and goddess and their cycles.  We were taught spellcraft and ritual from a young age, and I do not have a memory of a time when we were not participants in my mother’s sabbat rituals and often participants in her spellcraft as well.

Much of my mother’s path in Wicca resonated… but much of it also did not.   When my sister and I were around nine years old, my mother introduced a pagan parenting mentor to our family unit.  This person helped in mentoring our mother on different ways to include us in her practice and guide us in her beliefs, bur in truth Z (that is the mentor) really ended up taking over a huge majority of our spiritual upbringing herself, as well as teaching us about independence, autonomy, and the development of ethics and a moral compass.

When I moved out on my own at 16, I took those beliefs I had been raised with along with me into my independent life, and Z encouraged me to adjust my practices to fit what felt right for me.   The first thing I dropped was deity, as the god and goddess part of things never really felt right to me.

From there my personal practice was born.  I already had a vast amount of experience and knowledge in spellcraft and rituals, and I took that forward with me into my path and practice, weeding out the things that didn’t work for me, and planting the seeds for those things that did fit.

For this reason, although sixteen years have passed since I’ve been under my parent’s roof, there are still traces of Wicca and Buddhism in my practice.   These lingering bits and pieces are those things that still “fit”.

#31DaysofWitchcraft Prompt 12 & 13 (non)VR to Heather Carter

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Heather Carter on YouTube put together a series of prompts titled #31DaysofWitchcraft that she’s been working her way through since the beginning of May. I really like this idea, but I can’t handle the responsibility of any more daily posts, so I thought that for the next few weeks, I would do one (or a few at a time) for the end of week “My Pagan Perspective” posts and work through them a bit at a time.

spellbook

12. Do you have a separate witchy name? Why, or why not?

My “witchy name” is the same as my online name.  It’s Twist the Leaf.

This name comes from a line in a ritual that my sister and I wrote together as children.

To be fair, when I first came online, I used just “Twist” and then “Twist the Leaf” for circles and pagan events and activities.  But over the years, the two have melded and I now use Twist the Leaf in most places, and “Twist” as the shortened version here and there.

As for why.  My mother used to take my sister and I to a lot of Wiccan functions, and having a “witchy name” was all the rage in those circles.  I chose my “witchy name” initially in order to finally get them to stop pestering me about choosing one, but over time it’s become… more than that.

I no longer go to those events and haven’t for… at least fifteen years or more. Other than my sister (and our mentor recently as she’s been living with us for a bit now), my practice is primarily solitary.  But the name has stuck, and these days it seems that I’m actually more comfortable being called Twist than I am called by my birth name.

13. Do you write your own spells, use pre-written one or do a mix of both?

I write my own spellwork, or at times work on it together with my sister.

This falls back on the way we were raised. To be honest?  I don’t spend a lot of time reading pagan/wiccan/witchcraft books.  This isn’t how I learned my craft.  Because of this? Although I knew that published books had spells in them, I didn’t realize these were actually spells people used.  Like, letter for letter and word for word, used like a recipe to bake pastry.  This realization that people actually do that was baffling to me.

My sister and I were taught to write our own rituals and our own spellwork.  We were taught that it is a part of the process of casting a spell to do the work behind the spell, which includes doing the research to know what elements to include in the spellwork, and constructing the spell and wordwork ourselves.   I guess that because of this, I assumed that the spellwork in published books was there as a “jumping off point”?  You know, providing ideas and examples… but not there to be used as-is.

#31DaysofWitchcraft Prompt 5 & 8 (non)VR to Heather Carter

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

Heather Carter on YouTube put together a series of prompts titled #31DaysofWitchcraft that she’s been working her way through since the beginning of May.

I really like this idea, but I can’t handle the responsibility of any more daily posts, so I thought that for the next few weeks, I would do one (or a few at a time) for the end of week “My Pagan Perspective” posts. This is the third installment!

Coffee

5. Have you had a teacher in the craft? Have you ever taken a course or classes to help you learn witchcraft? What were your experiences? If you haven’t, how are your thoughts and feelings on such courses?

I have had a teacher in my craft.  In fact, I’ve had a couple. The first was my mother, who raised my twin sister and I in the Wiccan path, while my father provided influences from his Buddhist beliefs.

When we were around the age of nine, my mother reached out into the pagan community and welcomed a pagan parenting mentor into our lives to help with better teaching us the Wiccan path and incorporating us into the rituals and celebrations of that path.

What really ended up happening is that the mentor (Z) ended up being our main teacher and guide concerning not just our spiritual path, but also our moral compasses, learning self worth and independence, and many other things.  She cared for us a lot, and we spent a great deal of time at her house and attending different rituals and celebrations with her throughout our youth.

When I emancipated from my parents, she was there to help encourage me to find my own path.  A path that would fit me and feel right to me.   Even now, she is a part of my life and I consult with her often.   In fact she’s currently living with my sister and I because she’s stuck abroad while things are closed down and restricted due to the pandemic.

I have never taken a class about witchcraft.  I actually wasn’t even aware that there are classes available for witchcraft.  Apparently there are, but I’ve never seen them or heard of them before.  This is probably because I am primarily solitary, though.

I don’t really have a lot of thoughts and feelings concerning the idea of classes and/or courses on witchcraft.  Primarily, because I haven’t taken one and have no idea what they cover or if they would encourage individualization… or require conformity.  I lean in the direction of individualization… obviously.

8. Do you refer to yourself as a witch? If not, why not? If so, what does the word mean to you?

Okay so, yes.  I refer to myself as a witch.

In my opinion, the term “witch” is just another label for “person that does spellcraft/magic”. So therefore, whether you call yourself a witch or not is pretty irrelevant. A duck is a duck is a duck… call it a mallard (witch)? It’s still a duck.

As I do not live in a place where calling myself by what I am puts me in any real danger, nor am I in the closet or trying to hide myself in some way, I see no reason not to use the term.

I do understand choosing to not adopt a label tho. Labels can be problematic if taken the wrong way by family, society, etc and can even create personal safety issues. I think it’s okay to not use the label… but important to acknowledge that you are a part of the underlying group that includes that label, even if only to oneself.

 

Why I Don’t Own the Modern Witch Tarot

/ Twist the Leaf / 3 Comments

In a nutshell, it comes down it dishonest marketing ploys.

Modern Witch Tarot

So as I said, in a nutshell it comes down to dishonest marketing, but I’m going to go through and outline my issues below.  Yes, I know that my opinion on this is very much in the minority and highly controversial, but unfortunately?  I’ve not been able to “get over it” and look at this deck without feeling that polluted tinge of deceit and hypocrisy, so here we go…

When this deck came out and throughout the marketing process for it, this deck was billed as “LGBT Friendly” and “Diverse”.  These were it’s major selling points in its marketing campaign… and in my opinion?  They are both outright lies.

Why do I say they are lies?   Because there are no men in this deck.  None.   A fact that they very conveniently swept under the rug and was not mentioned even once… anywhere.     How can something be either LGBT Friendly or Diverse if you are excluding (nearly) 50% of the population from being represented in the deck?

To be clear.  I have no issue with women-only decks.  I have no issue with decks that celebrate the divine feminine in all her glory.  I think it’s a beautiful thing, and I own a few of those all-women decks myself.

What I have an issue with, is the hypocrisy of saying something is either LGBT friendly and/or diverse when you are very clearly and very consciously 1) excluding the G, B, and half the T  in the LGBT equation 2) excluding (nearly) half of the world’s population through sexism.  It’s bullshit, and it pisses me off.

I also have an issue with the name of the deck in relation to the missing (nearly) half of the world population.  The deck is named the “Modern Witch” tarot, and yet they are excluding men.  Males are also witches and a serious minority in witch circles.

Not only that, but in my experience male witches are often treated in those witch circles as the enemy and not to be trusted,  or as if they are superfluous and don’t count, or as tools to be utilized. To leave them out of a deck that is 1) supposed to be diverse, and 2) representative of “modern witches” is encouragement of this exclusionary behavior, in my opinion.

Again, I want to say this again.  I have no issue with women-only decks.  I have no issue with decks that celebrate the divine feminine in all her glory.  Women have gone through a lot in history, and still go through a lot of crap in today’s society.  But as a society we are supposed to be striving for equality.

Equality is not about restitution or who owes what to whom. Equality is about balance. If someone is going to make a deck that touts itself as diverse and a representative of modern witches (especially if it’s going out mass market around the world)?  It should truly be diverse and a representation of all modern witches…. instead of saying it is when it is very much a deceptive marketing ploy.

Just my opinion…. and a mini rant.

All of the above said?  The card’s artwork is beautiful.  It’s a beautifully made deck.  I just wish that it had been more honestly named and honorably marketed.   These issues make me unable to enjoy the deck, perhaps because every time I see it it reminds me of the subjugation and unpleasant treatment laid upon me by witch circles throughout my life for being a witch that is male.

 

#31DaysofWitchcraft Prompt 1-3 (non)VR to Heather Carter

/ Twist the Leaf / Leave a comment

Heather Carter on YouTube put together a series of prompts titled #31DaysofWitchcraft that she’s been working her way through since the beginning of May. I really like this idea, but I can’t handle the responsibility of any more daily posts, so I thought that for the next few weeks, I would do one (or a few at a time) for the end of week “My Pagan Perspective” posts. This is the first installment!

pine-cone

1. Is your witchcraft secular, spiritual or religious? How does this influence your practice?

My witchcraft is a blend of secular and spiritual.  I revere the energies of the elements as well as those of creation, evolution, and balance.   I incorporate these into much of my ritual witchcraft. At the same time? Much of my spellcraft is based not on faith but upon the secular qualities of the ingredients incorporated into the spells.

A secular example, I might imbibe  a cup of mint tea with magical intent for healthy digestion before giving it to my sister when her stomach is upset.   The magic is there within my will and my intent, which are pushed into the brew when it is made for her…. but, it is boosted by using the right ingredient for the purpose, which leans the ingredient into the energy of my intention.

Which is different than say… as a spiritual example, where I might plan a ritual that involves inviting the elements and those energies I revere into my ritual and my spellcraft, pulling them in to include them for not just their blessings, but also their power to be lent into my intent.  This is a conscious act to include a spiritual aspect that is not present in the first example.

2. Do you work with any specific deities as part of your practice? Why, or why not?

Nope.   My sister and I were raised Wiccan, and in that practice we included the god and goddess into our faith and our witchcraft.   But once I moved out of my parent’s home, the deity aspect was the first to go for me in adjusting my practice to better fit me personally.

It’s simply not an aspect that has ever really connected for me.  I don’t deny the concept of deity, only that it’s not a part of my own practice.  I’d never say “there’s no such thing as Loki, or Diana, or…. any of them” because honestly?  I don’t think that’s true.   I just know that for me, it’s not what feels right.  For me, a much better fit are the energies of creation, evolution, balance, and the elements.

3. What area of your practice are you currently focusing on, if any?

At the moment I’m pretty much in a “comfort zone” of sorts.  I have my divination practice and clients.  I have my daily devotionals and day to day spellcrafting.   But honestly?  I’m not researching or digging at this time.  A huge majority of my witchcraft (and pagan path, for that matter) is instinct and intuition.

When something strikes my interest or curiosity, I delve in and sate that need to know, and may or may not incorporate something into my path if it resonates strongly with me.   But there’s very little “study” going on… and other than my studies in plants?  There never really has been.  I’m comfortable.  I’m happy.  And I’m not looking to really “fill in any gaps” or change my path to something else as I don’t feel any lack of satisfaction in relation to the path (spiritual or witchcraft related) that I’m currently on.

 

Where My Perspectives Have Changed

/ Twist the Leaf / 1 Comment

So, last month on  YouTube, MIRTHandREVERENCE did a video answering a subscriber’s question about how her practices and perspectives have changed over the 40+ years she’s been on her path.    I really like this question, and decided I wanted to share my own experiences concerning the differences between how I was raised, and what I practice now.

crossroads

I think that the biggest difference is the use of deity.   In my parent’s home, we had the God and Goddess of the Pagan’s wheel of the year.  We also had Buddha, Sanshin, and Quan Yin.   My father had a shrine, my mother had an altar, and there were small statues set out in reverence to these deities throughout the house.

I never really felt comfortable worshiping deities, and once I had left my parents home soon after I turned sixteen, I stopped.  That isn’t to say that I stopped my faith, only that my faith changed.  I did not personify my faith, but rather reach beyond the faces and “deities” to the elements and the energy of creation, evolution, and balance itself.   This is where my focus lies in my devotionals, petitions, and invocations.

Along that same line is the difference in how much worship and prayer is involved as a whole.   I spend less time on my knees in front of a shrine or altar, and more time within nature, bonding and appreciating it all.  I also do a good deal of my worship standing or active within nature.

Group gatherings.  Meh.

Growing up, my parents attended many group gatherings with like-minded folks.  They had circles and they had munches.   They sought out a pagan parenting mentor (who you know as Z) to assist them in guiding my sister and I along a similar path.

Other than with my sister?  I don’t worship with others.  I have no interest in sitting in a coffee shop talking about deity and ritual.  I don’t need others energies and intentions and motivations screwing with my spellcraft.  Just… not for me, I guess.  I suppose you could say that I just don’t “play well with others” in that way.

There is much that has remained the same in the separation of those fifteen-ish years, but above are the most notable differences that have developed over time to transition my faith from that of my parents into something that works for me alone.