Choices… and Perspective

I may have stumbled upon one of the new perspectives that my Self Care Saturday spread from earlier this week was referring to while I was in the shower last evening.

Fish

Sometimes in my mind I gripe about the shit I don’t like… as I’m sure most people do.  You know… not the people per se, but like the soft water in this house that has a weird taste and makes it fucking impossible to rinse all the conditioner out of my hair.

And then my mind kind of wandered on to thinking about my shower at home, which has much harder water and you come out of it feeling much cleaner.  And in the middle of this thought, I had a memory of when my aunt and cousin came to visit MY home for a while and how she had complained about my water being too hard.

And that got me to thinking…

Would I rather have her (or them) visiting my home?

Or would I rather be a guest in her home?

Her home.  Hands down, 100% completely her home.  That’s the answer.  I don’t like them in my home.  I don’t like any of them in my home. I don’t like them touching my stuff, putting ass prints on my furniture in odd places, or mingling their scents into the familiar scent of my home. I don’t like their energy mucking up my space, their dirty dishes, or their constant disturbances, or the need to feed them or entertain them.  I hate it.  All of it. I really do.

If coming here now and again keeps them from coming to my house?  It’s worth the discomfort.   Absolute, completely worth every little shred of the discomfort of being here.

And that is an entirely new perspective on visiting family that I hadn’t thought of before. So there you go… there really is gold at the end of the rainbow, you just have to dig in the mud to find it.

Reassuring Stability

Today’s meditation was not guided or timed, and incorporated deep beating exercises with a mindful focus on the breath.

Today’s draw is the King of Pentacles, which represents a solid, fatherly energy, personality, or person in the area of money, resources, and the physical world.

Although the King of Pentacles is a strong alpha energy, it is the kind of energy that provides comfort and stability.

The King of Pentacles came to me this morning to reassure me. I go into surgery today, which is a bit stressful. His appearance is here today to tell me everything is going to be okay.

Don’t Get Sucked Into the Whirlpool

Today’s meditation was ten minutes and fourteen seconds, and focused on the environment, and how we can care for the environment by focusing on the now and what we do in the present in order to foster a better future.

Oh look! It’s me. It’s funny because the original Rider/Waite/Smith artwork for this card has a woman sitting up in bed with the nine swords stacked on the wall, but her face is resting in her hands. The depiction in the deck, on the other hand, is a woman holding her head in her hands like she has a headache. And, that is exactly how I woke up this morning.

The Nine of Swords Is a representation of fruition and consequences In the area of the thoughts, communication, instinct, and logic.

I believe this ties into The Moon card from yesterday, and this cards aspect of consequences, as the Nine of Swords often indicates that you are letting your worries and anxieties get the best of you and cloud your judgment.

Yesterday’s card (The Moon) warned about taking action without seeing the full picture. Here today we have the Nine of Swords indicating that I don’t have the full picture, as well as pointing out to me that I am stressing out and worrying… and that as a result, I am creating a sense within myself of being overwhelmed.

This card message is to remind me that I need to take a breath. I need to sit back and separate my worries from the facts, and move forward only once I have the correct research in place.

Never having had high cholesterol before, this is a dietary issue I’ve never had to deal with. This means that I have quite a bit of research to accomplish in order to get back on the right track. With my surgery coming up tomorrow and my orders due to go out on Friday, this doesn’t leave me a lot of room for other interests and distractions.

The Nine of Swords is telling me that instead of sitting in my mind and stewing about what’s going on with my health, I should just move forward with the best, most healthy decisions I know of at the moment, and then deal with the research once the next couple of stressful days have passed.

Lifting the Veil

Today’s meditation was 10 minutes and 34 seconds, and focused on the positive aspects of humility over ego, focusing on how one can enrich their lives by being grateful rather than with a mentality of entitlement.

I find this type of guided meditation not to be a focus for the day, so much as a “touchstone” of sorts. Something to view and absorb, agree with or contemplate, and in doing so these topics because a part of you. I like that.

Today’s draw is the Ten of Cups, which is a representation of endings and transcendence (and occasionally excess) in the areas of emotions, creativity, relationships, and imagination.

This card’s appearance today is a reminder to be grateful for what you have. This is not necessarily something that is difficult for me to do, but what IS difficult is to realize today’s contentment, and in the process allowing myself to let go of that iron grip I have on pushing forward. It is as if with the drive to push, push, push onward and forward towards my goals, a veil drops over the present, hiding it from my view.

That is the message from the Ten of Cups in today’s draw. It’s okay to push ahead, but not so hard that you miss the things in your life right now that make you content and happy.

Lift the veil that ambition and drive use to obscure the present and be grateful for the road you’ve trod, and the lessons you’ve learned. Carry that knowledge forward with you, along with the contentment and pleasure you have within the present moment.