Morning Bonus Read – Personal Expectations

The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
“This week, let’s chat about our expectations of ourselves, especially during this busy time of the year.”

Ouija Playing Cards by HasbroWhat is one expectation I have of myself right now that is unhealthy?

Ten of Diamonds atop King of Hearts – That I can shoulder everything and not crack emotionally under the pressure like a dropped egg.  I am not the King of Hearts, and I do not do well under too much pressure, especially if my emotions become involved.  With my emotions at a higher level due to the emotional growth I’ve been fostering all spring and summer and the vulnerability that new growth has created, there is a risk of that shell being even more fragile than usual.

What is one expectation I have of myself right now that is healthy?

Ten of Hearts – Allowing my emotions to have free reign rather than being neatly boxed off and walled up for the next five to six weeks.  This seems counter intuitive to what is said in the advice above about what is unhealthy, and yet what this indicates is not that it is opposing advice, but rather that I need to find a better way of dealing with these emotions than closing them up in a dark cage in the basement.

How should I shift the unhealthy expectation into a healthy one?

King of Clubs – Use your drive and vision to motivate you into finding and using this better way of doing things.  New methods for old habits are hard for everyone, but you need to remember what you’re goals are… and that you can’t reach them unless you make these changes for the better.

Where should I look for support to make that change in my expectations?

Six of Clubs atop Queen of Clubs –  From those in your life that both admire you and inspire you.  With a foundation of admiration and moral support under your feet, you can take the inspiration that they create in you and carry it forward, even when things feel new, unsteady, vulnerable, or difficult.  That support system is there for you when you need it as long as you’re willing to reach for it.

DECK USED: OUIJA PLAYING CARDS BY HASBRO

Morning Bonus Read – Situational Projections

The prompt for this reading came from one of my Discord servers and is as follows:
There is a LOT of energy in the world this week. We are all carrying and absorbing a lot of anxiety, relief, uncertainty, etc, I’d guess. It’s crucial during these kinds of times to try to pay attention to our intuition underneath the anxiety, although this can be tricky to do. This week, pick one (or more) situation in your life that you need to make a decision on this month, and do a situation-action-outcome reading on it. The goal here is to get clarity and give our intuition (or spiritual guidance) a voice even in the midst of uncertainty and anxiety and big emotions.

Bag of Bones Playing CardsI chose to allow the cards to choose the situation discussed in the reading.  Therefore, the cards pulled for “situation” are used to describe the situation that becomes the topic of the reading as a whole.

Situation No. 1

SituationTwo of Spades atop Ten of Hearts – Struggling with decision-making when it comes to working on my emotional growth. I’m so used to using logic and discounting my emotions that sometimes it’s extremely difficult for me to allow my emotions to filter into the decision making process. This means that I end up stuck and stagnant rather than moving forward. This is a problem I struggled with through the summer months and feels… unfinished.

ActionTwo of Clubs – Taking the time to plan and strategize rather than just ignoring the problem or moving forward without a plan. I haven’t quite figured out how to do this yet.  I think it has to do with making sure I’m focusing on where I want to go, though, instead of becoming distracted by that feeling of lack of progress and ending up stuck there.

OutcomeKing of Diamonds – Taking control of my goals and being able to accomplish them from the rooted place of a stable foundation.  The King of Diamonds indicates that allowing my emotions to have a say in my decision making process won’t steer me off track regardless of the fact it feels like it might.

Situation No. 2

SituationTen of Clubs – Overburdening myself is a situation that I find myself in a lot.  Like… A LOT.  Although, this summer I did make a few changes that seemed to help a good deal with my cycles of burnout and recovery.I managed to make it through all of the summer without a single burnout episode, actually, which is kind of unheard of.   But now with the holiday rush upon me, I know that the old tendency to burn myself out until I’m not just overburdened but no longer able to function is on the rise.

ActionNine of Diamonds – Pretending everything is all right and good and that I’m in a good place instead of looking at the problem.  This is my main way of functioning through discomfort, whether that discomfort is pain or exhaustion, or any other number of situations.  The problem is?  When I do this it creates a well of closeted and walled off emotions, because I have to numb my insides for it to work.

OutcomeFour of Hearts – Delays due to dejection are the results of this unhealthy way of dealing with my tendency to overburden myself.  As I am susceptible to clinical depression, dejection is not a safe thing for me as it allows the slope down into the pit of depression to become slippery, and the more slippery that slope becomes then the faster and easier I slide down into the pit.  This reading is a warning about what not to do… and what to watch out for.

DECK USED: BAG OF BONES PLAYING CARDS