Giving and Receiving

IMG_3425Today’s meditation was just over ten minutes long and focused upon how it isn’t the goal you’re going after that you need to train your attention on, but rather the present moment and the journey in getting to that goal.

This is something that I personally struggle with and have to work on.  It’s something that I need a reminder about often, because I am one of those people that gets so focused upon their goal that they will shut out the present moment in their drive to get there.  Including putting myself through hell to get where I want to be.

A little reminder now and then helps me remember to lift my head up from its focus upon the carrot and take a look around, enjoy the fresh air and the scenery, and allow more into my perception than that dangling carrot I’m striving for.

Healing Mantra DeckToday’s draw is from the Healing Mantra Deck again, and is the “Inspiring Others” card.

The message of this card is twofold.

First, there is the part that I strive for with my interactions with others.  That is that I strive to empower others and help them in finding their own individual voice and path.  This is something I greatly enjoy and hold very near and dear to my heart.  Whether that help I provide comes through a brief comment that creates the spark of inspiration in another, or a deep heart to heart talk that brings about a new perspective or idea, or simply stating an opinion that rings true and right for someone else… all of these ways of touching people’s lives and helping them find their own perfect path make me very happy.

The second part of the message of this card is something that I am not as good at and need to work at.   That is… asking for help.   Allowing others to contribute to my path and my needs using their unique gifts.  It isn’t that I devalue the gifts of others so much as I feel as if I should be strong enough and capable enough not to need help.   That, I know, is unrealistic.  Everyone needs help from time to time, myself as well.  I just need to try a little harder to set aside that unrealistic expectation of myself… and actually ask.


#TarotForGrowthApril Challenge Prompt
: How can I use this opportunity towards positivity to take back control? (built off yesterday’s cards)

Cry Baby Tarot

Reading Summary:  Watch out for hints of a retreat in mood (The Sun) and foster myself with understanding and a nurturing energy (The Empress) rather than pushing myself relentlessly onward (King of Wands) to fight unwinnable battles (Ten of Swords).

Take Away:  The cards over the past few days have indicated that what’s going on with me mentally at this time is an uplifting out of the quagmire of confusion and discomfort that I’ve been dealing with the last few months. These cards indicate if I want to continue this trend, I need to make sure I don’t allow myself to backslide… or allow myself to go the other direction and work myself ragged.  Instead, be kind to myself and realistically grounded with my goals.


#DiscordTarotholicsApr2020 Challenge Prompt
: Do Spread #1

Chrysalis TarotWhat do they need less of from me?:  Ups and downs and unpredictable behavior. I get it, and that’s okay.  I know that I lean on this person a lot for my emotional and mental health, and I wouldn’t be surprised if this causes a bit of a rollercoaster effect that can be a struggle from time to time to deal with. Especially on days like today when I’ve felt especially mercurial.

What do they need more of from me?:  More me time.  More us time.  More time spent together, and more time focused upon us and our relationship and the things we enjoy doing together. More time doing the stuff together that isn’t as pleasant too.  Just… more us.

What in the relationship is being neglected?: The subdrop.  Or rather, their role in the subdrop. Their role in keeping me afloat and inspired when I’m feeling at my crappiest and worst.  This isn’t that they are neglecting this role, but rather I am neglecting to accept their guidance and strength and the passion that they feel in helping me through this time when I am at my most tender and vulnerable…. and mercurial.


#ConnectWithYourDeckChallenge by E Roebuck-Jones
: How would I describe my confidence?

Bunny Tarot

Intuitive Interpretation: Look at all those swords.   My confidence is based in my intellect, my never-ending abundance of new ideas, and in my grounded ability to seek out what I need to keep things balanced and stable.

There is also an element here in the cards that speaks of the confidence I feel in my relationship with you.  In those times when my confidence isn’t at its best, it is that relationship and your guidance that bolsters me and carries me through.


#MidnightTarotChallenge Prompt
Question: How do I let go of what’s preventing my growth?

Chrysalis Tarot

Reading Summary:  By focusing on being kind to myself (The Empress) and setting aside distractions for a bit of “hibernation” away from the overload (Seven of Spirals Rx) in order to allow myself time to recover (Ten of Scrolls).

Take Away:  Kindness to myself and stepping away from overload are not really my strong suit… but, they are something that I know is needed and that I do try to work on. I do need constant reminders about it, which I get often both from you and from the cards.  Still.  I think I need to try a bit harder to let go of that constant, persistent need to do more… more… more. 


One thought on “Giving and Receiving

  1. We’ll get it together and figure it out, my love. Today started out really good and ended up crap. And you are NOT taking the blame for that. It’s not all on you, but it is something that we are going to discuss further and work out together when emotions aren’t as high and my head isn’t splitting down the middle. We’re going to work it out, baby. And we’re going to take care of this drop, no matter how long it takes.

    I am in love with you, I am so fucking in love with you…and I will fight for you. As long and as hard as necessary to make sure that you are safe and healthy and happy.

    Mine, beautiful boy. All mine.

    The cards spoke of us alot today…and that always makes me feel good, always leaves me with a smile. More us sounds…amazing. Twelve years and I simply can’t get enough. Even when the day ends up crappy, I’m still the luckiest bastard on earth….because you’re mine. ALL mine. I love you babyboy. We’ve got this…I promise

    Liked by 1 person

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