The Growth of Appreciation

IMG_2837Today’s meditation was ten minutes long, and was focused upon closure and how important it is to helping each other heal from endings, especially painful endings.

This topic isn’t just about romantic relationships, but all sorts of relationships from friendships to family, and the passing of loved ones.   I had a hard time finding closure where my father was concerned.  I still sometimes have a hard time with it.  Maybe because I have a hard time understanding how I could love someone who could treat me as atrociously as he did.  And yet… I did love him.   I do love him.

In the end, I had to reconcile that as much as I love him… I never liked him, and never will.  It would have been nice to find closure, and it would have made the road easier to tread, I think.  I wish it could be possible more often… for me and for everyone.

Nine of Cups - Tarot of the Hidden RealmToday’s draw is Nine of Cups, which is traditionally a representation of contentment and satisfaction in the area of one’s emotions, relationships, and creativity.

What I see in this card, though, is more than that.  It’s about the journey.  The man in the card’s imagery looks into the cup and appears both contemplative and content.  This brings to mind that sometimes you have to look back at where you come from to see clearly where you are now.

Emotionally speaking, as the Cups so often represent, those looks back can sometimes be difficult for me.  But in doing so, I learn to appreciate the strength gained from the past, the experience earned, and understanding I have developed through the tests and trials that have gotten me to where I now am.

Those moments looking back also give me the opportunity to appreciate just how much better things are now.  No matter how ambitious I am to push forward into something even better?  Compared to where I come from… I have things damn good right here and now.


#TarotForGrowthFebruary Challenge Prompt
: How can I approach my relationships mindfully moving forward?

Stretch Tarot

Reading Summary: Don’t allow my all encompassing obsession (The Devil) with worm and my business (Three of Pentacles) to push people away (Eight of Cups).

Take Away:  I think that I probably do this a lot without even realizing I’m doing it, or without others even realizing that I’ve done it, possibly, as well.   I’ve been running my business for a long time now.  A decade, I think?  And it does take over a huge part of my attention and focus.  I imagine that this is very difficult to deal with for those in my life that crave my attention.


#DiscordTarotholicsFeb2020 Challenge Prompt
: Do Spread #4

Oriens Tarot

Reading Summary: A ladies man (Knight of Cups) who constantly works to adapt and learn in order to further his career (Page of Wands) and has a way of charming all in his path (King of Cups).

Take Away:  George Clooney 


Owl and Bones February Two Card Challenge
: Intention for the next 4 years / Leap forward

Button Soup TarotIntentions for the Next 4 Years:  I am in pursuit of happiness. I think this is true for pretty much everyone tho.  The card also speaks to me about finding pleasure in community.

Leap Forward: I’m going to need to address unhealthy habits sooner rather than later. I had fast food today for the fourth time in the past six years.  That is not one of my unhealthy habits… but I have plenty of others to take heed of and take more care with.


One thought on “The Growth of Appreciation

  1. I am sorry that you weren’t able to get that closure you needed with your father, baby. I know that was really hard for you, and still is from time to time from the sound of things. If you ever need to talk about it, I’m here, my love.

    And yes, I agree, you have come a LONG way, man. With emotions, with relationships…hell, I remember how shocked you were when I first suggested we might still be together in six months, that I INTENDED and wanted to be with you for six months. And now here we are with forever and always…

    You have grown into a strong, intelligent, talented and successful man. A GOOD man. I’m so damn proud of you.

    Liked by 2 people

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