Today’s meditation was… well, I’m not entirely how long it was, because I fell asleep.  It was relaxing, though. I think that just a lack of sleep combined with the taxing part of having both the helper and the housekeeper coming by today just took it out of me.  I laid down and became still, and off to sleep I went.

Today’s draw is Queen of Bats (Swords), which is a representation of a receptive alpha energy in the area of intellect, thought, logic, communication, and instinct.  This involves themes that include independent thought, reflection on new ideas without the need for conformity (ie: clear boundaries), a lack of bias, and direct communication.

When I look at today’s card, what I see is strength reflected through the posture of the queen and her sword, and an openness to hear out others while staying firm in one’s own foundations that is demonstrated in her welcoming of the flying bat combined with the death moth that is both at the base of her throne as well as within her crown. The moon smiling down feels like a blessing and approval, displaying an indication that this path is the right one for this moment in time.

I think this is a really interesting card to draw today, because I find myself reflecting on the definition of what an empath is, and if it really applies to me as I thought it did.  The thing is, I do not feel other people’s emotions in the way that I understand empathic abilities to work.  Instead, I sense and react to energy.  From that energy, my body can then interpret and even empathize with emotions from others… but it is not the direct connection and mimicry of emotion that others seem to define the ability as having.

Clearly, this feels like a separation between what I’m experiencing, and what is generally defined as empathic ability.  I wonder, then, if in fact this isn’t empathic ability at all, but something else that I haven’t yet found a name and/or definition for yet.

This, to me, fits in with the Queen of Bats because it runs along the line of intellectual examination, independent thought, and non-conformity.

Deck Used: Halloween Tarot

Bonus Reading

I did the #TarotForGrowthOctober prompt today from Instagram.

Question: How can I recognize my own power to manifest growth?  I specifically focused on growth concerning my business in this inquiry.

Reading Summary:  If you would just give yourself a chance to be nicer to yourself and embrace the emotional gifts others are offering,  the world would be at your feet.  Stop and examine where you feel scarcity.

Take Away:  I need to sit with my emotions, look at and delve into a better understanding of them, and allow others to contribute to my life with their own emotions as well.   This is the aspect of my life where I am at my weakest, as I often have a hard time connecting with others in this manner, or experiencing the world through that lens. I need to take a breath and ease my strangle hold of stress concerning finances and the business or it will smother under my grip.

Deck Used: Skele-Tarot